As days go by i learn something new. I learn that the brain is easily manipulated, no matter how together you think you have it, it’s easily brainwashed. I found that i had trouble letting go of my toxic friendship after everything that had happened. I didn’t even know that there was a thing called traumatic bonding. I was put down for making it that we couldn’t stay friends after i blocked J. I still had my head filled that i was guilty for what happened, mainly cause he kept drilling it to believe that way. I felt this strong pull toward him after he kept touching me, he didn’t respect my no’s, he sent me a horrible facebook message from a fake account that he created just to put me down. Put a guilt trip on me that i caused him to try to shoot himself in the head five times, that i caused him to start drinking again. After something like that i should have never wanted to talk to him again, but instead i let him back into my life and i did all the apologizing. He, again, started treating me horrible, harrassing me, and not respecting my wishes. I couldn’t understand why i took so long to finally get him completely out of my life. This link below helped me understand why i was like that for about four months after his assault on me. Once, i made him mad enough to stop contacting me for a few months, then he came back with his demands and manipulation on how i had to keep in contact with him or i wasn’t being a friend. i was strong and held my ground against him. It was like a new me had been discovered. I needed that time away from him to develop the strength to break free. No one who is toxic, or has assaulted you should stay in your life, that is just them still controlling you. I hope this link helps people who may be struggling with this to learn how to break free. Traumatic bond is horrible, and No one deserves to have to live like that.
traumitic bonding good insite❤